Oh yes I am!!! I had the opportunity this week for two whole days in my studio, and I hate to admit I feel as though I have totally wasted them!! I sat there wondering what to do, trying to put my thoughts and ideas into some kind of order and trying to decide what I wanted to start. I even got all my old college sketchbooks out and had a look thru them to kick start my creativity. And finally, by day two, I had made a decision (ok, I admit I didn't fully waste day 1, i was doing Christmas stuff, special treats for special people).
Eureka moment (!) and I decided I was going to start getting some ideas down for a series of childrens birthday cards, (you know the ones with how old they are on them?). I fancied doing some printing, as I haven't done any for ages, and so thats what I did! I had a brand new sketchbook to fill with my ideas and sketches and prints. But the day just didn't work out how I expected and I am left feeling completely uninspired, frustrated, in a crap mood and a bad-temper, (WITH MYSELF!!!). It seems like every day I try to spend time in the studio I end up feeling like this. I feel like I am putting myself under too much pressure and then not enjoying the whole creative process as a result. What on earth is wrong with me??? And what can I do to stop myself feeling like this? Does anyone else know what I mean or am I really going a bit bonkers?? It seems I'm always harping on about feeling this way about my work, sometimes I wonder if I should just give it up.... but then I'd have a studio at the top of the garden staring at me as well as a pile of empty sketchbooks smirking and sniggering in the cupboard!! Blinking eck, someone give me a shake or just a reality check at least (if not, a great big kick up the arse will do!!)
But, on a more jovial festive note, we now have our Christmas tree (a small one in a pot, so the new dog isn't tempted by all our lovely baubles), and my husband is upstairs whistling carols and listening to Scrooge on the radio!! Ahhh!!